Life's Too Short to Always Be On A Diet

After having a delicious and calorie laden meal, the realization hit that life is simply too short to always be on a diet. What's the point of never eating anything you love just because it might add a pound? As I once said to my doctor, when chocolate was considered bad for you, "I think if I gave up chocolate, it would only seem like I lived longer." He said I was probably right.

I think I've been on some sort of food watch ever since I was a teenager and felt awkward and bigger than a hippopotamus. Everyone was dieting, even those I thought were skinny. They went to their doctors who injected them with something like sheep piss. I couldn't wait to see my doctor. "I want to lose weight," I told him, anticipating he'd immediately agree and give me the shot. Instead, he said, "Eat less." It was then I knew he was an idiot. "Eat less?!?!?!" Doesn't that guy know anything? Eat less. What kind of advice is that?"

Then I turned 19 and for some reason lost my craving for food. I ate less. I ate a lot less, and I went from a size 12 to size 7. I now weighed 122 pounds. Part of me knew I looked good, but the part that was always self-critical, could still find body parts to pick at. My thighs, for instance. I'd always thought that since I was 5'7-1/2", if I lost weight, I'd have long, thin thighs. Nope. I will never have long thin thighs because I don't have long legs. But I'll tell you, from the vantage point of decades later, I looked unbelievably great!

I had to get a lot older to finally understand about appreciating my body and knowing what to do with it. Of course, by then, I'd walk into a room and my butt would show up a bit later (kidding). I had to learn to wear thongs in order to avoid the dreaded pantyline. Don't you just hate when you can see where the underwear stop and a woman's floppy butt and thighs bulge? I do and I wasn't ever going to be joining those ranks.

I've been on all sorts of diets over the years and inevitably, they only work for a while because, eventually, I still want to eat. I've made deals with myself about food and given up things I adore: chips, ice cream, cake, omelets. But I haven't given them up for a good. And every night I have at least one piece of chocolate because life is too short to live in a perpetual state of deprivation.

And by the way, I look damn good for an old broad!